The first blog is a long one just to get caught up :)

The Beginning

After much internal thinking regarding our 7 year relationship and my/our future, the words finally came out one night in bed. We were just about to fall asleep when I found enough courage to say what no man wants to hear..."Babe, we need to talk." 

I proceeded to tell Frank that I decided I would like us to have a baby. He was, of coarse, ecstatic! 

I should explain that a lot of my thoughts were a little more complicated than normal...you see, I am 27 and Frank is 50. Not the typical relationship but what is, really. We had been together for a long time, obviously committed and very happy together, I just had never thought I would want to have a child, that was just always my mindset as a very independent woman. But, after many sleepless nights thinking about everything, I realized that now is the time!

Frank is an amazing, selfless, thoughtful, caring, did I say amazing guy and I am so excited to share this with him.

Full Speed Ahead 

So...we decided that we are going to get pregnant and we want it now! Unfortunately, after a quick visit to our regular doctor, it wasn't going to be quite as quick and easy as we had hoped. Frank had a vasectomy about 15 years ago. I obviously was aware of this but did not realize that it was that big of a deal. The doctor explained our options and because there were only 2 (one of which could take a year or more) we made a quick decision to move forward with IVF with ICSI and PESA.

Hard Hitting News

We made an appointment with the best reproductive medicine physician in the area so we could move forward. During our consultation, the doctor went into quite a bit of detail regarding the process. What I was realizing as he was explaining everything was how much it was going to involve me! I kept thinking, what the hell! I am young, fertile and healthy, why would I have to go through all of this with procedures, shots, hormones, blood tests, ugg! Really hard hitting and disappointing news. But, the important part is that it can be done, we can make it happen and actually the fact that I am young, fertile and healthy just makes things better for us and our odds of getting pregnant through IVF. We concluded our appointment by providing blood samples. The next time I talked to then was about 2 weeks later when I started my period. I had to call so they could start me on birth control (I had never taken it before because when your boyfriend has a vasectomy it's quite pointless).

Trial PESA
Frank and I went in to do what they call a "Trial PESA" procedure. We had talked a lot about how we didn't understand how it could be a "trial", we knew that even though he has a vasectomy, he still produced sperm so what is the big deal, just grab then and freeze them!

Frank was given anesthesia and about 1 hour later I was able to come back and see him. He was very woozy still when the doctor came in to give us the news. Doctor tells us that he found sperm but none of them were living. Only dead sperm! How?! We can't believe this, we thought we were golden. It turns out that the longer you have a vasectomy, the more sperm die and build up inside. He proceeds to tell us that he is confident that Frank is still producing live sperm but that he will have to go in for another surgery. Not only that, but the surgery will be on the same day as mine! The doctor will have to go in deeper to find the living sperms and that means they cannot be frozen for later use, they have to be extracted on the same day as my eggs. Oh man, this just got a lot more nerve racking! After more blood testing, doctor put Frank on Clomid for his testosterone levels just to make sure everything is good for the surgery. We only get one shot so Frank is set on taking whatever he needs to make it work!

Another Hiccup
The Monday following Franks procedure, we went back for my Water Ultrasound. This is standard protocol just to make sure my uterus is good to go. As the doctor is moving the ultrasound back and forth to see all around, he keeps going back to this one spot. He states that he thinks there is a Pollop. What?! WTH is a Pollop and how could I have one? Well, im really not happy at this point. Now we both have had bad news. Turns out I have to go in to have this Pollop removed because they will not do IVF unless I have the best chances of getting pregnant. The pollop is about a half centimeter and he wasn't too concerned. He just said to have it removed just in case the embryo wants to attached right at that spot, the pollop would stop it from attaching and no pregnancy. We don't want that to happen so this Thursday I will go in to have it removed. 


Moving Forward
Tonight is Sunday night and the first day of this blog. I have had to catch you up on all the happening up until this point. I just took the last pill of my first pack of birth control. Officially been on it for 21 days. My worst symptoms have been being really really cold all of the time and moderate back pain (which I had prior to the pills anyway so who knows...). The doctor says to stay on the birth control until after my surgery...Then I will get on the official IVF calendar and start the hormones...oh boy, maybe the hormones will have a reverse effect on me and make me have a better attitude!